About me

Despite being an electrical engineer, I shifted to absolutely unrelated verticals, thanks to my love for web technologies and blogging. Yes, I am the tech journo that you get to hear about, so much, these days.

Personally, I shall call myself just a chilled out guy (too chilled out to be termed darned lazy, at times). Known to don a nerdy look most of the times and am overtly obsessed with my BlackBerry :-) Currently based out of Bengaluru, working in an IT company as the 'SMM Guy'!
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Beautiful Again!

January 9th, 2010 by Shayon received 40 Comments »

5 years! Yes, it’s gonna be 5 years of being in a relationship, next month. And I wonder, what had it been that tied us together for so long? Now, I normally do not discuss my relationships on my blog. But her last 2 blog posts, kind of, got me carried away.

It’s been a while since she got bit by the “marriage” bug. No, I am not complaining. As a matter of fact, it was actually me who had first started speaking about it. It was me who started weaving the “future“. It was me who started making “plans” and even executing them. But then, hey, aren’t guys supposed to be the ones to shy away from the M word? Then, what was I thinking?

The fact is, I got tired. I got tired of seeing her go away, every single evening. I got tired of trying to pay attention to her whispers, every single night. I got tired of not being able to drift off to sleep, in her arms, without keeping an ear on the ticking noise. I got tired of staying miles apart, checking out for cheap flight tickets and wondering if I could just plant a kiss on her lips, next weekend. Yes, I even got tired of waiting for weekends, to be able to make plans of meeting up. Yes, I got tired!

I wonder, how do people do it? How do they stay in a relationship and yet not stay together? I wonder, how can you sleep all alone, every single night, when you know there’s someone out there thinking about you, wishing you by the side, wanting to ravage you the next time you get to meet? I wonder how couples can get so lovey-dovey and cosy in the restaurants, parks and even in office, but yet go back to different homes, different lives, at the end of the day.

And yet, when she started with the “marriage talks“, I started getting cold in my feet! No, I am not afraid of “commitment“. And I am sure she can vouch for that. But, I just do not know how to figure when it’s the “right time” to get wedded. I mean, shouldn’t you be worrying about your future? Shouldn’t you be a bit practical and take a peek at your savings account, before you decide to take the plunge? Shouldn’t you have a clear future plan, at least for the next 10 years, before you decide to take the vow? Shouldn’t you first let both set of the parents get comfortable with each other, before you decide to encircle the fire 7 times? Shouldn’t you be asking yourself, “Buddy, are you ready for it?”

No, I do not wanna chicken out. Rather, I wanna get into it as bad as it can get. But the problem is, I just do not know if it’s time. I do not know whether we are following the right “protocols“. I do not know whether I would still want a marriage if we were allowed to live together, under the same roof, and if society accepted us as any other married couple. I do not know if I’d ever wanna elope with her, in case either of our parents do not give in to our relationship. Neither do I know if I shall be able to keep her happy, after we get married.

All I know is, I love her. Yes, I do love her, goddammit!!

Yes, you are right. My life is fucked!

But then again, I have her, to make my life beautiful again!

Tags: , , ,

Posted under: Personal, Relationships, Thoughts

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40 Responses to “Beautiful Again!”

  1. Sakshi says:

    I am the She..!! And I am totally outta words. I agree with each of his words. The only thing I know is, that, I want to be with to be happy. Marriage or no marriage… I love you sweetheart, and this post made me realize the distance between us. totally.

  2. yadu says:

    that was sweet ^_^

    + lolz.. protocols.. stuck there myself :P in a way..

  3. Praval Singh says:

    Dang! I guess I need to send this email along with Sakshi’s rpely to my girl. If at all it works. :)

    God bless you both!

    • Shayon says:

      It wasn’t really an email, but I got your drift :-)
      Never knew u too were in a relationship. Wish you all the best, man. So, u planning to tie the knot soon? ;-)

      • Praval Singh says:

        Oh, I meant send this article as an Email! Yeah, it’s been almost 2 years now! You missed out on the Samsung Bloggers’ meet this time at Khan Market. Took here there as well. She’s not a weboholic like us. Nothing beyond emails and MS exchange at work! ;)

        Knots! Good question. No answers for now1 Atleast not this year.

  4. rohini says:

    hey cngrts to bth of you…..

  5. ki says:

    Tell me about living far away from the guy I love!

    It’s close to impossible sometimes, especially ‘cos he stays in another country, far far away. But it’s the hope for our life together that keeps us going. :) Protocol or no protocol, two people in love should be together. so FIX IT! :)

  6. Shalini says:

    The third para…AWESOME and totally true!! Its crazy. Me and my boyfriend sometimes wonder if we were in the USA and could live-in together…its just so hard not being with each other all the time!

  7. Shayon says:

    @Ki & @Shalini: I am wondering, you both are also in a long distance relationship? Oh man, suddenly, how I wish the world hadn’t become a ’small’ place, after all. Then you would at least fall in love with the one just next door, or next building :-p

  8. Raj says:

    Its been 7 years v know each other & u have changed. Its a nice change. I think ul b the 1st one to tie the knot off all of us. If its by 2k11, il drink that day.
    al the best. If u want to run n marry den m there to give all type of support :) :)

    • Shayon says:

      Dude, u r a gem of a friend, man! Truthfully, I had never believed that we would “click”. I guess my 1.5 years of extra stay, in Jsr, changed the equation.

      Anyway, I guess you are surely gonna be drinking when I get married. And yeah, you are gonna get to dance with Sakshi, too :-)

      In a way, that’s good. ‘Coz I got two left feet :-p

  9. Sakshi says:

    @ Raj and Shayon
    That is nice… you guys can’t just anything on my marriage. Shayon won’t do anything anyways coz he is too lazy… but Raj like really, I am looking forward to your getting drunk and our dance…!! :)

    Btw- Shayon ji- I couldn’t agree with Raj more- its a NICE change. I like it.

  10. Sakshi says:

    And, well, both of you are crazy and I think that we should repost this on TWM.

    • Shayon says:

      hey.. no re-posting. If they wish, they can come to this blog and read it.

      • D says:

        Kudos to you’ll! It’s gonna be real fun for a wedding like this- especially since we’ve known eachother this long! And I didn’t even realise it’s been 7 years! My, my! How the years have flown by.
        And Shayon, if you want us to read this post then you should have given some indication to its existence (like Sakshi did)! I don’t visit this blog on a regular basis!

      • I was here.. :)

        Lovely outburst..

  11. The Bald Guy says:

    Shyon Bhai Sahab ji, You, my man, are now doomed for life.

    Run, while you still can!

    Good luck both of you! Now I’m going to open my closet and decide what I’ll wear to your wedding. And I will go to Sakshi’s blog and comment that Shayon is so sweet and you’re very lucky blah blah.

    But dude, Run! Run! Run!

    Don’t ruin your life! Go!

    Good luck! I want an invite to the wedding!

  12. The Bald Guy says:

    Oh and by the way, Long distance is way better than being too close and having her pop over every day looking for food and every evening with laundry to be done. Trust me. My girl choses each night for dinner between what her mother makes and what I make!

    BAH!

    Women!

    Sheesh!

    Be happy dude! Long distance is good!

    Atleast you don’t have to do the dishes each night!

    ;)

    • Sakshi says:

      RAMIT!!! You are outrageous!!! But never mind. BTW- Decide which side you wanna be on, accordingly you will get the invite (which is BTW- some time off)

      On the RECORD-
      I can’t cook, but Shayon cooks coz he likes to. And, I like doing dishes, so, I used to do em, if there was a need. (EVER heard of a maid… )

  13. AD says:

    Truly touching. I am also currently in a similar situation, except that for me its too early for a marriage and that we are (geographically) separated by some seven seas. Initial few months seemed quite a bit to bear, but am currently trying to get used to reality. Looking ahead….

  14. Ramit says:

    SAKSHI!!! I know I am outrageous! But that advice was sensible, even if I cannot stop laughing!

    Hmmm, Are you sure you even want me to be at your wedding?

    Hmmmm…

    Why is Shayon Bhaiya ji so quiet? Hein ji?

    • Shayon says:

      Frankly, I had no clue on what I should be writing. Hence, kept my trap shut. You ask me to run. Even I am in half a mind to do it. But alas! Never before have I come across such bastard chains that, despite being non-tangible and invisible, keep me in tow so securely. Got no clue how to release myself off them. And what more, I ain’t even sure if I’d wanna get released :-p

      And well, as and when I get wedded, you are surely invited. As for Ms Sakshi’s invitation, you shall have to enquire yourself :-)

  15. Pratik says:

    Hey man, All the Best and do let us know what were the factors and the benchmarking value , based on which you will take the decison…( i am sorry, this is just my analyst mind speaking)…..cheers!!

  16. Ramit says:

    Run bhai! Bhaaaaaag ja!

    No, I cannot see another guy ruin his life and get married!

    I pity you.

    :P

  17. Sorcerer says:

    *congrats

    errr..houston…. we got..a situation…another bachelor.. nearing escape velocity..

  18. Ramit says:

    That’s because you’re not married yet dude! I feel for you!

    As a male human being, it is my responsibility to encourage you to run!

    Bhaaag bhai bhaaag!

    :P


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